The Book of Gabriel

Cover: 
Author: 
Grim Richard
Category: 
Prose

In 1999, Grim Richard began writing a book for his unborn son. His goal was simple - to pass on all the really good advice to his son before he chickened out, matured into a responsible adult or both. Funny and provocative!

From the introduction:

Gabriel,

I ?began ?writing ?this ?book ?for ?you ?when ?you? were ?about 16 ?months­ old ?and? it ?should ?be ?read ?some time? after ?you reach ?puberty, ?regardless ?of? whether ?you? consider? me ?a dork?at ?that ?time. ?I? realized? your? life? might? run? more smoothly ?if?I? made? a ?list? of? the? shortcuts,? hard­ earned lessons ?and ?family? anecdotes ?I’ve? gathered ?over ?my ?vast years ?of ?wizened? experience.? Generally ?speaking,? that’s what? this? book ?is ?about.

Specifically, ?it ?contains? invaluable? information ?about lucky? pennies,? using? pick­up ?lines? on ?women,? Sea Monkeys, ?buying? drinks ?for? the? aforementioned ?women and,? as? I’ll? explain? more ?fully ?later,? nudist? camp? etiquette.

Some? of? the? advice ?contained ?will? seem ?tragically ?unhip. Forgive? me. ?I? was ?born ?prior ?to? the ?Internet; ?I ?can’t? help it.

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